Irish budget airline Ryanair is set to anger its passengers when its new policy comes into force during the Summer of 2025. From July 1, a £1 charge is payable to any Ryanair passenger wanting to spend a penny in one of the aircraft’s toilets.
Having a wee or a dreaded number two during a flight anywhere is never an enjoyable experience. Cramped, smelly conditions akin to a typical Dewsbury dwelling, with the added excitement of some unexpected turbulence causing havoc. If they wish to spend a penny or lay some cable mid-flight, Ryanair customers will have to part with a pound coin.
“We’re always looking for ways to screw our passengers out of every last penny,” a Ryanair spokesperson said, “and this is the latest innovation we have come up with. A singular pound or euro coin seems a fair price to pay and should see the company generate even more profits for its shareholders.”
Ryanair made €1.92 billion after tax during the last financial year, setting a new record. Its €13.444 billion turnover was also an all-time high for the Irish cost cutters, thanks to 169 million poor saps choosing to fly with them.
Ryanair and Other Budget Airlines Often Criticised
Budget airlines often get a bad rep due to their underhand tactics to relieve passengers of their money. People flying with Ryanair and similar airlines usually do so not by choice but necessity. Such passengers are not flush with cash and choose budget airlines to save money.
However, these firms often hide the true cost of their flights by plying them with dozens of added extras. For example, you can fly from Leeds Bradford at 10:00 p.m. to Dublin next Friday for £26.44. A return flight at 07:25 a.m. on Sunday is available for the seemingly bargain price of £16.99. Add those together, and you arrive at £43.43 for return flights.
Those flights allow you to take a 40x25x20 bag with you, around the size of the handbag that comes with most Barbie dolls. You better not have a bag measuring 41x25x20 because that adds £22.93 per flight. That £22.93 gives you priority access to overhead lockers and a 10kg overhead locker bag. Oh, and you get to choose from a select few rows of seats. You can’t just buy a seat next to your friend or loved one; you must purchase the full shebang. Your £43.43 bargain is suddenly £89.29.
Those wanting to take a 20kg check-in bag must fork out £34.24 per flight, which doesn’t even get you priority boarding or a full choice of where to sit for your £111.91. If you want complete flexibility of where you can sit, want priority boarding, and only have a 10kg overhead locker bag, you can upgrade to Flexi Plus for the bargain price of an extra £89.32 per flight, or £222.06 in total.
Furious Passengers Speak Out
The Yorkshire Tribune asked several Ryanair passengers at Leeds Bradford Airport for their thoughts on the new toilet charge.
“It’s disgusting,” Jamie O’Brien told The Yorkshire Tribune. “I like to have six pints before any 6:00 a.m. flight, so I’m busting for a piss before we get off the runway. I always book a window seat and love barging past other passengers four or five times per flight. This ridiculous charge will cost me another £10-15 each time I fly.”
Johnny Brown thinks he has devised the perfect plan to avoid paying £1 to use the facilities.
“I’ll likely take an empty bottle and use it if I think I can’t reach the toilet at my destination. I’m not sure how that will work if I need a shit; I’ll think of something if that happens. Alternatively, I’ll slash on the floor. There’s usually an inch-thick layer of dust and food crumbs in front of each seat, which should go some way to soaking up my wazz.”
Does the new Ryanair toilet charge affect you? What do you think of budget airlines taking the piss? Let The Yorkshire Tribune know.
