Football fans nationwide are united in a quest to prevent Manchester United from sacking head coach Ruben Amorim. Thousands of match-going fans have signed a petition on the GOV.UK website, each hoping to keep the clueless Portuguese manager at the helm of Old Trafford.
Manchester United swooped for Amorim on November 1, 2024, after sacking Dutchman Erik ten Hag. The Red Devils’ hierarchy thought Amorim was the man who would bring the glory days back to Old Trafford. They thought wrong.
Amorim’s 71% win rate while in charge of Sporting Lisbon looks impressive on paper. However, one must realise that the Portuguese Primeira Liga is of a similar standard to League 1 in the United Kingdom, with “giants” such as Arouca, Casa Pia, Estoril, and Rio Ave competing alongside a couple of half-decent teams.
Manchester United’s Demise Under Amorim
Nobody will deny that Manchester United has gone backwards since Amorin took charge. It is magnificent to witness. Under Amorim, the team has won only seven of its last 29 Premier League matches. They finished 15th last season with only 42 points and scored a meagre 44 goals.
Despite apparent financial issues, the Manchester United board made £200 million available to their coach for a new attacking line-up. In came Matheus Cunha and his massive ego, the chunky Bryan Mbeumo after the one decent season of his career, and giant youngster Benjamin Sesko, who has scored plenty of goals in the Austrian farmers’ league.
Just as Manchester United fans thought things could not become any worse, League 2’s Grimsby Town knocked them out of the EFL Cup on August 27. Despite fielding a full-strength team, Amorin’s men found themselves two-nil down inside 30 minutes. Bryan Kinder Bueno pulled a goal back on 75 minutes before Harry Maguire equalised with one minute remaining.
Grimsby ran out 12-11 winners in the resultant penalty shootout, prompting a pitch invasion and chants of “you’re getting sacked in the morning” to the hapless Amorin.
Petition Nears 10,000 Signature Target
UK Parliament requires 10,000 signatures on an online petition for it to consider being up for parliamentary debate. The petition to keep Amorim in a job has gained over 8,000 signatures in less than 24 hours.
“For years, Manchester United fans have been the most unsufferable wa*kers known to man,” explained Billy Tasker, a Huddersfield Town season ticket holder and petition signer. “From Fergie Time and the self-entitlement that comes with winning everything to that tw*t Gary Neville on Sky Sports, everything about Moan United stinks.”
“I can’t wait for their supporters to start flying those Norwich scarves again. We could play them in the Championship next season, but only if Amorim remains in charge. The government should ensure the Old Trafford faithful endure this charlatan for as long as possible; it’s for the good of the country’s mental wellbeing.”
Manchester United is next in action on August 30, when they host newly promoted Burnley. The Premier League then has a brief pause for the international break before Amorim’s shockingly bad squad heads to Manchester City on September 14, where they could end up on the receiving end of a serious hiding. Here’s hoping.
