News so out there you couldn't make it up!
A government-funded study on fashion trends has revealed men who regularly wear ankle-length trousers are more likely to be twats. The study discovered that the effect is amplified if the trouser wearer neglects to wear socks. The same group is responsible for bringing you life-changing investigations into how to make a cup of tea, the […]
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It’s almost Halloween, which means in a couple of days, thousands of children up and down the United Kingdom will go begging at strangers’ doors in complete contravention of what we teach them. Those organised folks among you will have already kitted out Little Jimmy in a scary Halloween outfit. If you are still to […]
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The government dropped a bombshell earlier this week when it confirmed the sale of single-use disposable vapes will be banned in England and Wales from June 2025. The announcement has left millions of vapers wondering how they will enjoy their nicotine fix. Imperial Tobacco has devised an ingenious plan to stop vapers’ rattling withdrawals. From […]
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Save some of your benefits and get peddling your shoplifted goods because there’s a massive night on the horizon at the one and only Three Legs pub on The Headrow. Superstar DJs Judge Jules and Paul Oakenfold are heading to “The Dump” for a New Year’s Eve party for the ages. Entry is limited, with […]
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A Hollywood-inspired Purge Night is an idea gaining traction in the House of Commons as the Labour government struggles to control the prison overcrowding crisis. The Yorkshire Tribune has learned that Justice Secretary Shabana Mahmood is open to the United Kingdom following in the footsteps of James DeMonaco’s 2013 movie, The Purge. The first set […]
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The British Government should look at alternatives to wind farms in its quest for greener energy, according to the founder of the Too Windy All the Time (TWAT) action group. Bernie Callaghan claims the United Kingdom is windy enough without another 400 wind turbines installed at the Hornsea Wind Farm. The Hornsea Wind Farm is […]
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Yorkshire puddings will be a thing of the past if the UK Protected Food Names scheme (UKGI) agrees with that lot over the Pennines. The Yorkshire Tribune‘s Lancashire correspondent, Richard “Dick” Head, has learned that Lancashire City Council has applied to the UKGI to rename the Sunday dinner staple to Lancashire puddings. Certain foodstuffs can […]
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Dewsbury residents are celebrating today after news broke that the West Yorkshire market town will be twinned with Beirut. Twin towns, or sister cities, were first established and adopted globally during World War II, which incidentally was the last time it was desirable to live in Dewsbury. Traditionally, twin towns have participated in various cultural […]
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The complete numpties who donated £32,000 worth of clothes to Prime Minister Sir Keir Starmer will soon be able to dress like him after the PM announced he is launching a fashion brand. “Toolmaker,” according to Sir Starmer’s press release, is a brand that has working-class roots but, at the same time, is prohibitively expensive. […]
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The Yorkshire Tribune has learned that the next phase of Leeds City Council’s plan to stop all cars entering the city centre will drastically change the bus gates and one-way system. The council has tinkered with the city centre’s roads since the introduction of bus gates in 2021, but shopkeepers and business owners are outraged […]
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